I woke up early this morning when Ben went to play basketball, and I was laying in bed feeling completely overwhelmed with gratitude. So many of you have been so happy and thrilled for us and I want to tell you all thank you. You have no idea how grateful and touched we are to be so blessed by your sweet words and emotions!
So here's our story, for the record. Last March marked our two year mark of trying to get pregnant unsuccessfully. That time included a year where we hoped we wouldn't have to use medication, despite the doctor's warnings. When we obviously needed help after a year we began a rough year on fertility meds and tests. It was on to Clomid, which failed to cause ovulation. After that it was on to a different, more brutal pill. Three times a day everyday and sick for a few months. It was, quite honestly, awful and I was no peach while I was on it. Ben was a sweetheart for putting up with me. After about 4 months on that came the day I have previously written about, when my doctor informed me I was over his head and needed more help. All this time on these meds ovulation never occurred.
Although these were a hard few months, they were also full of blessings. Never did Ben and I really feel despair over this. We always just felt that it must not be the right time and were able to feel confident in the Lord that it would work out eventually. Don't get me wrong, I definitely had my moments. But Ben was right there to reassure me and to remind me that everything would be okay. This time also provided some awesome quality time for us as husband and wife, for which I am forever grateful. I have been blessed with one stellar man and I count my blessings everyday that we have forever together.
To continue, after the doctor gave me that little tidbit of information we began to plan our next move. Meanwhile I continued on my pills, just in case, and eventually combined the Clomid with the current pill. Still nothing. I had, however, gotten over most of the sickness caused by the pill, although there were still some sweet side effects to deal with. Nothing major but definitely annoying.
In February I discovered a big bump and it was off to the doctor again... It took a few visits but they eventually decided it was a hernia. Surgery was scheduled for March 30, and Ben and I decided to call it quits on the fertility meds before the surgery. After a lot of talk we decided to plan for artificial insemination in the summer, which would give my incision time to heal before hopefully getting pregnant. Just before the surgery, while sitting in Young Women General Conference with my darling beehives, I realized that it was time for me to go back to school. It was quite the clear prompting, and I got busy signing up for classes, figuring out our payment plans, meeting with counselors and adjusting my work schedule, since I had one month before summer semester started. So busy was I with planning school, and so excited to be going back, that Ben and I decided to postpone the artificial insemination. I was excited to be moving on with school and the end was in sight for my teaching degree. Pregnancy was put on the backburner and, you guessed it.... that apparently was all it needed!!
In the middle of May I began cramping and when it didn't stop, I began thinking I should take a test. Not that I thought anything of it, mind you, but I figured I would. On May 31st I was driving home from class and still cramping, nothing major just out of the ordinary. I decided to stop by the dollar store and pick up a few tests. Ironically, as I was driving, I had a funny (in retrospect) thought. Class had been really good that day and I was really getting into the learning groove again. I thought "It's good that I'm not pregnant because I'm so excited to be finishing school right now." Ha ha ha. I'm positive the Lord has a sense of humor and was chuckling at that one.
That night I took the test. Ben had no idea I was going to take one because really, there was no reason to tell him. I wasn't pregnant, right, so this was just routine, something I did every few months. Well, when the two lines appeared, I started shaking and breathing really fast and praying really fast (it went something like... "thank you thank you thank you thank you..."). I went and told Ben and he didn't believe me til I showed him the test.... And the rest is as you know it!
I have felt incredible, and been blessed to skip the pregnancy sickness. This little girl
(Did I mention that? IT'S A GIRL :))
is growing like a weed and measures long and lean. She is kicking out of control and made it quite difficult for the doctor to get a good heartbeat at my 3d ultrasound on Wednesday. Every time they tried she would start kicking and mess it up. LOVE HER! The placenta implanted on the front of the uterus so it's cushioning the movements, which is why I haven't felt any of it yet. I'm okay with that, since I am sure it will come soon enough. We are already madly in love with her and are so excited that she is coming to join our little family. One thing I do know for certain is that this life is one hundred percent in the Lord's timing. And we're so thankful that now is our time for this little angel!
PERFECT!! I love this whole story! It is so true that the Lord has a plan for all of us! I am SO glad that His for you included having kids!
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorite quotes is:
"Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well
from which your laughter rises
was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being,
the more joy you can contain."
- Kahlil Gibran
My dear, I think that the well of sorrow carved out in a womans heart, that prays desperately for the opportunity to be a mother, is the deepest of wells. And when that prayer is answered, it is the deepest of joys! Because of your struggle for something that comes so easily to others, I daresay that you have a deeper ability to feel the gratitude of Motherhood! You will love that little girl so much! I can't wait to meet her and can't wait to watch you guys enjoy her!
BIG BIG LOVES!
Can I just say that I love your little family. I'm glad your are all part of mine.
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